Take two and call us in the morning...
My dad told me this joke when I was 6 years old, and it's stuck with me ever since: two kids are walking in the woods when one sees something that looks like chocolate drops on the ground. "What are those?" he asks. "They're smart pills," says the other kid, "if you eat them they'll make you smarter."
The first kid says, "Really?" He picks up a couple and throws them down the hatch. "They taste like rabbit droppings" he says, spitting them out.
"See, you're getting smarter already."
DISCLAIMER: "Smart Pills" are just breath mints and have no medicinal value whatsoever. They contain sugar, but are not irony free. They are, however, ineffective against ignorance.
N.B. Each order contains four vials, with approximately 100 mints total. U.S. orders only – we can't imagine the conniption and confusion at customs in, say, Singapore.